Original Notes By Rage

So, what better way to mourn MJ then too watch all of his Music Videos on Youtube, right? Wrong. Youtube's video comments are the most pointless, crappy, blatantly racist wastes of gigabytes I've ever seen. I'm pretty sure the big fat rich Google team could care less who writes what and where. People were being so racist it's not even funny. I think that if someone knows someone who knows someone who knows any of the big fat idiots who don't have a comment moderating feature on Youtube, they should like, yell at them or something.

People are so stupid

So maybe the Mayans predicted the world would end in 2012,but you know what, I've got no retorts that don't have to do with Ralf Nader, so screw those old dead guys. Here's my evidence. Let's start with Farrah. She was a chick. Now she's dead. Oh no. But then...MJ? How does this happen? It's gotta be some kinda conspiracy! And now Billy Mays? That guy was my favorite annoying commercial screamer! I think I'll go buy ten bottles of Oxi-Clean in his memory. So there're three dead famous people. Now this all started in 1963 with JFK. Did you know he was carrying a piece of the All-Spark with him before he was sniped down by Lee Harvey Oswald, AKA the Terminator? So I've discovered something while wasting my first precious days of summer getting fatter and typing on the computer. America is wasting away. All saround us is war. There's about as much hope as there is oil left in the world. I'm not being serious, by the way. I'd only be saying that if I were old and white. And I am white, but that's besides the point. I like to think of myself as a more tanish caramel blend. Back to the point, we're heading into judgement day! Armageddon. The apocalypse is near! And do you know how to prevent it? Do you know how to save the Earth? I'm sure you want to. You know you want to. Well, here's how. Give me 4 million dollars, all of your computers, and some really hot chicks. Then I'll ask God to spare you or something.

Don't take this personally. Who ever doesn't gets paddled.

Now I'm afraid someone is gonna take me seriously and call the FBI. Crap. Ignore this entire note.

Haha are you still reading? Lemme tell you, you're wasting SOOO much of your life.

26 seconds! Wow!

Lemme get this BS straight. I have held on two my Cell Phone for more than two years now. My same, crappy LG gray phone Razor-Rip Off. Everyone else, started out with a somewhat better phone. Of course, there were people who had worse phones, but not many. Now here comes the good part. I may seems a little-stalkerish for keeping track.

6 people dropped their phone
2 people got their phone cracked in half when...
...5 people were frustrated that they left their phone in their pants before a wash just after talking to the...
...Nick Harras 1 person who dropped their phone off a rollercoaster
and the 43 people who had a phone for only one year but decided to throw it down a well so their parents can help the economy buy buying a new one or something.

So, every one of those people got a brand new, sparkly phone. Some got an envy, the lucky ones got Iphones or blackberrys, some simply got brand shiny new versions of their old phone.

So, I asked my mom for an upgrade. You know her exact response? F$%^ NO!

No luck, so I'm looking for suggestions, should I....

A. Chuck my phone at someones head
B. Pretend to trip and smash my phone through a window
C. Eat a sandwich while holding my phone, accidentally bite phone (Preferred, it would knock out my last baby tooth.)
D. Magnetize it
E. Put it in the fridge
Or F. pretend to be talking to someone when I hear a pop (me stepping on bubble-wrap) get surprised and drop phone into glass of water.

But really, folks, my best bet would be a hammer accident. Toss out suggestions please!

-Rage, kind of