Hello and welcome new followers! Now that somebody's actually reading this blog, I think I'll take the time to give you what may be the most astounding message from God in the good ol' 21st century. This kicks some of those hoaxes right of the list, including:
#57: George Bush, the true Moses, who led our people into the holy land
#58: Fighting outbreaks between Russia and Georgia, God told Putin to follow his command
#59: The great prophet, Elija Wood. He freed our people of the worship of gold.
May I just say #57 was the funniest. Anyway, since I love to make lists with numbers, I'll give you the series of events with the turnout of the dream that means everything:
1. Wednesday, 1:10 PM. I was violated by a rainbow colored article of clothing.
2. Thursday, 1:11 PM (Creepy huh,) I had diarrhea from all of the Kid Cuisine microwave meals I was eating
3. Friday: 1:12 AM. I wake up from the dream that I am about to tell you about:
I am walking from "uptown." I pass Ackjay Ieldsfay's old house. I see a guy in a gold camaro, and I wave hello because he looks like a friendly old guy. Then, out of habbit, I flip him off. Then he stalks me to the other side of the street, and by this time his car has somehow transformed into the pink thunderbird's car thingie, and then he roles down the window after getting into a traffic jam and says "It's impolite to flip off old people." Then he drives away.
Now there are many ways one can interpret that, but here's what I think it meant:
Gold Camaro: Memories from Steven Pastis's book forward.
Flipping old guy off: I have to stop doing that.
Old Guy: God.
Pink Thunderbird Car: The show was pretty cool. The remake sucked, but it had better special effects and the car looked better. I would kill to drive thunderbird five. Or maybe the red rocket. I found a toy submarine the other day, and it turned out to be thunderbird 4. Oh well.
So, what we make of this, is that I read to many comics, I swear a lot, rocket ships are cool, and that God is here with us, driving a car, the car took shape two times, but it could possibly be a third.
There's one more event that plays out. Yesterday, at 1:13 PM, I see a car with a Yankee's license plate and an old guy driving in it. I assume this old guy is Yogi Bear or whatever his name is.
Therefore, Yogi Bear is God. If I were you, I'd try to prevent a forest fire right now.
-Rage
#57: George Bush, the true Moses, who led our people into the holy land
#58: Fighting outbreaks between Russia and Georgia, God told Putin to follow his command
#59: The great prophet, Elija Wood. He freed our people of the worship of gold.
May I just say #57 was the funniest. Anyway, since I love to make lists with numbers, I'll give you the series of events with the turnout of the dream that means everything:
1. Wednesday, 1:10 PM. I was violated by a rainbow colored article of clothing.
2. Thursday, 1:11 PM (Creepy huh,) I had diarrhea from all of the Kid Cuisine microwave meals I was eating
3. Friday: 1:12 AM. I wake up from the dream that I am about to tell you about:
I am walking from "uptown." I pass Ackjay Ieldsfay's old house. I see a guy in a gold camaro, and I wave hello because he looks like a friendly old guy. Then, out of habbit, I flip him off. Then he stalks me to the other side of the street, and by this time his car has somehow transformed into the pink thunderbird's car thingie, and then he roles down the window after getting into a traffic jam and says "It's impolite to flip off old people." Then he drives away.
Now there are many ways one can interpret that, but here's what I think it meant:
Gold Camaro: Memories from Steven Pastis's book forward.
Flipping old guy off: I have to stop doing that.
Old Guy: God.
Pink Thunderbird Car: The show was pretty cool. The remake sucked, but it had better special effects and the car looked better. I would kill to drive thunderbird five. Or maybe the red rocket. I found a toy submarine the other day, and it turned out to be thunderbird 4. Oh well.
So, what we make of this, is that I read to many comics, I swear a lot, rocket ships are cool, and that God is here with us, driving a car, the car took shape two times, but it could possibly be a third.
There's one more event that plays out. Yesterday, at 1:13 PM, I see a car with a Yankee's license plate and an old guy driving in it. I assume this old guy is Yogi Bear or whatever his name is.
Therefore, Yogi Bear is God. If I were you, I'd try to prevent a forest fire right now.
-Rage
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